What I Learned in Sex School

By Anka Radakovich

I am sitting on the floor with 18 other women at the Good Vibrations store in Berkeley, CA. We're all here to learn the art of "male erotic massage." In other words, we're taking a class on how to give a good hand job.

Chances are, the last time you took a class on sex was in 10th grade (when the message was "don't do it!"). But today's real sexual revolution is in grown-up sex education. Sex classes are more popular than ever these days and are popping up in cities all over the country. For about $25, you can add to your sexual repertoire, refine your technique, and improve your sex life. "Couples today want to have better relationships and better sex, and if taking a class helps, they'll do it," says Carol Queen, Ph.D., chief cultural officer and staff sexologist at the Good Vibrations stores in San Francisco, Berkeley, and Boston. "The classes are fun and sexually inspiring. People feel more confident when they're better informed."

Personally, I love going to "sex school." As someone who makes her living researching and writing about sex, I can never get enough when it comes to learning more about it. But I know that for a lot of people, the idea's a little embarrassing. So I went to sex school for you and took some notes. Here are the best tips ever from 10 of the weirdest, wildest, sexiest sex classes in the country.

Tap into all your senses
At "Coming to Our Senses: A Sensational Sensuality Workshop" (lasara.us), instructor and author LaSara FireFox says, "The more you indulge in your senses and become familiar with them, the more pleasure you'll be able to receive." Her "isolation and indulgence" exercises help you single out the senses and explore them one by one. For each exercise, one partner is the guide and the other is the "sensory explorer." My partner and I start with him blindfolding me, to take the emphasis off the visual. To experiment with hearing, students whisper in each other's ears, forcing them to listen really closely. Isolating touch involves rubbing something on each other's skin, like a feather or honey. (Classes are clothed, but students are told to practice at home au naturel.) We're encouraged to say, after experiencing a sensation, "I like that feeling" or "I don't like that." Likewise, when sampling smells, it's okay for one person to say, "That smells good" and the other to say, "That makes me puke." The lesson is to communicate what you like and dislike, an idea that's stressed at many of the classes I attended.

Touch "everything but"
"The object of this class is to drive a man insane," announces our instructor, Elizabeth, at the start of the "Male Erotic Massage" class I took at Good Vibrations (goodvibes.com). How do you do that? Begin by touching everything but his penis. "Start with a very soft, featherlike touch," explains Elizabeth, a professional masseuse. "Lightly touch the pubic bone area to wake up the nerves in the area."

It's all about the tongue,  ,  Take it slooow