Thepeeq    Photo glowfish 

    By MadameA

The term "fingering" implies a naughtiness akin to the hard, fervent fucking found in porn. While using your hands can and should be hot, as a means of foreplay, it should never mimic actual intercourse. The following wisdom is intended for you dudes out there who think your index digit is a smaller, more versatile version of your dick.

Turning on a woman means practicing the art of clitoral stimulation doggedly and constantly. And practicing anything is no fun without some incentive. If you give her nether region the extra time and attention it needs, you'll have her aching to have sex with you like a crazed animal. The coitus that follows won't just be hotter, longer and more intense - it's got the potential to be downright wild. Getting a fully aroused woman to try new positions is only the tip of the erotic iceberg; spanking, handcuffs, role-play, anal...there's no telling what she'll do. But the clit is the key to unleashing the tiger-in-the-sack, and you can't unlock the cage without learning to rub it right.

A few things need to happen before your fingers dare to enter the vicinity of the clit. Imagine you're hooking up with your fling and you've successfully removed her pants or skirt. Your next move is not to remove the panties. We repeat: Do not remove the panties. Leave them on, and run your hands all over her inner thighs, butt and hips.

A note here on dry humping: If you must grind against her with your stiffy, do it early enough in the nookie session that both of you still have your pants on (think middle school make-out parties - those were hot). Once you're fooling around sans bottoms, don't thrust your boxer brief-clad boner against her undies - it's juvenile and lazy. She already knows that you're hard and want to bang her. What she doesn't know is that - after your fingers have worked their magic - she'll really, really want to bang you too.

Start revving her up by massaging the outside of her panties in a circular motion with your index and middle finger. FYI - the clit is a mysterious little nub situated at the top of her labia and it's in front of the vagina, not attached to it. If you rub the clit too hard or too fast, it will retreat under its hood like a frightened turtle. But if you stroke too softly or too slowly, the clit won't give a shit that you're even there. Don't be afraid to use a little pressure with moderate speed - there's still a layer of material barricading your fingers from her soon-to-be-wet garden. Make like Goldilocks and touch her just right. 

After you've spent ample time on this exercise (read: more than five minutes, less than fifteen) use your fingers to start teasing her out of her undies. If you can feel some moisture through the material and/or she starts groping at your schlong enthusiastically, removing the panties is a go. But don't be fooled - she's not ready yet, and she won't be until you've given her a fully engorged clit.

After you've removed her undies, continue to massage the outside of her naked coochie like before, in that two-fingered circular motion. Regardless of her increasing wetness and sexy sighs, do not vary your just-right pressure and speed. Now is the time for serious restraint; at this point, between her inevitable moaning and your feeling how wet she is, it's tough not to abandon foreplay for the main event. But the longer you delay actual intercourse, the more she'll want you inside her.

You've hopefully figured out by now that just sticking a finger up a girl's coochie as a preview of what your cock wants to do won't turn her on. This doesn't make hand penetration a foreplay no-no; it's totally effective (and hot) if it's done post-clit stroking. Once she's already wet, slip a digit in and out of her slowly. Very slowly. This kind of fingering should resemble - for lack of a better term - lovemaking, not fucking. As long as you refrain from thrusting the entire length of your finger in and out of her at a quickened pace, she'll be good to go.

If, after your attentive handiwork, she's bucking against your digits and dragging your pelvis toward hers, congrats! You're in for some unreal sex.

And what about oral? Oral sex can be a means of foreplay or a main event. Going down on her before intercourse is a good idea if you're well-versed in cunnilingus - some gentle clit-flicking will certainly up your chances of some intense fucking. But if you're too good, she might get off pre-penetration and need some recovery time before she's ready to go again. (Conversely, if you suck at oral, it'll make her less turned on and subsequently less interested in having sex with you).  Go for oral, if you're willing to take those chances.

A note here on lube: It's for intercourse, not foreplay. Squirting some on your fingers and rubbing her allows you to dupe yourself into thinking she's aroused when really, she's just letting some dude rub goo on her nether parts. Use a little on your condom right before you enter her, or later in the evening during round two of the ridiculous sex achieved by good foreplay.